a week of poker

my results for the last 7 sessions and comments there upon:

1. -200 my first day back and in looking back over my records, i find that i lose more often than not on my first day back. it is as i don't have my "timing." my game is off, i make bad calls, play bad cards and play them poorly, a sure fire recipe for heavy losses.

2. + 70 was card dead for most of the session and was behind most of the sessions but just ground it out and walked away a small winner.

3. +40 a repeat of #2. amazing how many cards i threw away these two days. when the cards are not running at all for you, your job is to keep your losses to an absolute minimum, take less chances, get even tighter. wait for that one hand that can pull you out of the hole. your other way to keep them at a minimum is to get up and go when they are just running against you, i will get up and go if someone draws out on me several times. it is not my day, get out. when it is just cards i usually stay because if i am playing right then somewhere along the line i will get my shot more often than not. somewhere, i am going to get dealt a big pocket pair and i am going to raise and my card will come on the flop and ba da boom, ba da bing. i am out of the hole, thank you very much; good night.

4. +410 all made on one hand with quad jacks against full house and nut flush. thank you and good night.

5. - 80 another card dead day and after a little over 4 hours without a peek at a hand, i said, thank you and good night.

6. +872 i started off going almost a hundred in the hole when i failed to bet a guy off his flush draw; he played the hand very poorly and got away with it. he did not get any money on the river because he checked it to me and thought i was going to bet when the 3rd spade came, he was wrong. his mistakes were earlier, he bet the draw and and had to pay off a big raise on the turn (i had trips) plus he was playing little non connected suited cards in early position. i said to myself, 'self, i gonna get this boy." later, he was in hand with me and i had aces, raised 15 and he was the only one who called and the flop came king, king, ten. i checked and he bet and it threw it away and showed my aces. everybody was stunned that i threw away the aces. he said he had the king when the hand was over but whether he did or not makes no difference to me. i didn't have the king, i had 15 in the pot. what do i care? (now understand, i, by this time, was several hundred ahead and the cards were coming my way. he now has got 75 dollars from me on those two hands.) still later, i am on big blind and the pot is raised to 15 and two people call so there is 48 in pot and i peek down and lo and behold aces again! i call the 15 and raise 50 dollars. the original raiser calls and so does my boy. there is now 198 dollars in the pot. flop is Jack, 7, 5, rainbow. my boy has about 300 in front of him and i have about the same. i bet 100 dollars and the orginal raiser mucks so on to my boy and he hesitates and then goes all in. i call and turn over the aces and he had a pair of threes. i won. (i think that because he saw me throw away my aces before that i would throw away whatever i had because of his big bet.) so i got my 75 back from him with 300 dollars interest. there was another guy like that on the table and i got his money too. i got good cards, good flops and people calling down with a worse hand than mine and, guess what? they didn't improve. see it happens like that as well sometimes and during those times, maximize, jack, maximize!

7. +103. sorta of in the middle kinda of day. was down about 35 and hadn't really played in a hand yet and am on the bb with 3-5 off suit and the flop comes 6h, 7h, 4s. i check, it is bet 15 and a caller and then back to me and i make it 40 to go and only the original bettor calls. the turn is the Qd, (perfect!) i bet 75 dollars and goddamn if he don't call. the river is the Jc (perfect again!!) i bet all in and he throws it away. i think he had two pair or a set and finally came to the conclusion that i must have flopped the straight. since there was a bigger straight available (5-8) i figured, correctly as it turns out, that he didn't have it or he would have reraised me on the flop and not let me draw to either a flush or trips.

in case you lost track, the week went this way:
-200
+70 -130
+40 -90
+410 +320
-80 +240
+872 +1,112
+103 +1,215

i fully believe the luck evens itself out and that we all get the same share of good and bad hands. it is how you play them and, in my opinion, even more important how you DON'T play them that seperates the good from the bad and losers from their money. they weren't unlucky. they were bad players. you really don't have to be tricky or clever. you wait for good hands and for fools to pay you off.

i have said this before: almost every time that i lost at a poker table it WAS MY FAULT. i played poorly. when i am playing properly, i know when TO THROW THE MOTHERFUCKERS AWAY! if you know that and practice that you will win at poker. keep the winners, throw the losers away. sounds simple but it is beyond most players.

this is why i don't play bigger games than the 1-2 with a two hundred dollar buy-in at this level, there are fools in these games. i don't have to be good, i just have to be better than they are. bigger games get better players. why play against a table where 5 of my opponents are much better than me when i can play at tables when i am either the best or one of the best two or three at the table? it is the end of october, i have made enough this year for me to pay my house note for 7 and one half months. granted, my house payment is low but it is 7 and one half months that my wife and i were able to put a roof over our head strictly on my poker winnings. this is my first year of playing no limit and i haven't put in more than 350 hours for the entire year. i am encouraged at my results so far.

poker muse

someone asked daniel N. (not even going to try to spell it--fuck, i can't even say it) what were the hardest cards to play in no limit hold-em and he said, "good cards in early position." that is so fucking right. take two fairly good but also dangerous cards, ace-queen off and ace-jack off (and this hand is a jack off hand because it is really fucking dangerous unless you have the top two pair or the straight because anyone that calls you ace flop bet could very easily have you out kicked). if you raise with these two cards from first or second position you are so early in the betting sequence that if you bet big the only ones who call you are either ace-king or ace queen or big pairs or sometimes medium pairs. if you raise small, you still can get too many callers so that unless the flop hits you right on the buttton it surely hit someone else. same would go for just calling with aq or aj in early position and see what devolopes. this problem is the same with big pairs, raise big and you only get called by big hands and so once again you are looking for a good flop. jacks and queens are very dangerous early. if an ace comes and you bet, if you are called you are beat, if an ace comes and you check you open yourself up for someone to just flat ass steal the pot by betting. if you raise big and everyone folds, you win just a big and little blind and in 1-2 that means 3 fucking dollars.

so, in my opinion, how you play good cards in early position has to take into account the make up of the table. no two tables are going to be exactly the same but they can be divided into certain general groupings; passive, aggressive, tricky, straight ahead, bluffers, rocks. can you bully them? will they call you down with a small pair? will they bully you?

i would like to hear from some of you out there who are, as i, hooked on hold-em and ask you how you go about playing ace queen or jack and how do you adjust if they are suited? not only preflop but on the flop and turn. for my part, pussy that i am, i throw away ace jack in first or second position unless suited and then i put in a small raise and cold call with ace queen unless suited and then i do as i would with the aj suited. one of my goals is to keep my losses low and therefore i play very, very tight in early position. however, i could be leaving money on the table. thoughts????

great food off strip

one of the really nice things about living in las vegas is the incredible variety of food available and for rhonda and me, very accessible. we know of great restaurants off the strip where one can eat wonderful food for reasonable prices. so, if you are coming to vegas and would like to know where some of these places are, write me here on the blog as a coment on any current post and i will direct you to them. we know of THE VERY BEST THAI place in the country, plus where to get tamales, chille rellenos, bar b que, french, middle eastern, salvadoran, steak and an eclectic place that will just blow your socks off. i like turning out-of-towners on to these places because it gives you a different view of vegas from that of just from or on the strip.

we will be releasing a new dvd before the end of the year, we want to get it out before christmas (nothing like some shock under the tree) and hopefully before the first of december. stay tuned.

played no limit the last two days and have won both times but not very much (115 for the two days) though i played very well. i was just card dead for most of the time but kept from getting bored or discouraged and just waited and waited and waited until i got something and was able to walk away each day a winner without ever having any kind of a run or rush. grind 'em out poker.

blah blah blah

little richard, castro, fast food fools

as the beginning of this post i ask you to read the first comment on the previous post; it is about little richard, one of the founding fathers of rock and roll and is written by a friend of mine. a nice piece of work that should touch your heart and soul.



one of the things that the politicians have on their side is the ignorance of the american people about history. this ignorance allows politicians to tell lies that get swallowed hook, line and sinker. it is not just republicans or neo-cons who do this, manipulaters from left use historical distortion as well. bearing this in mind let us go to todays latest decree from king george the decider: he declared new sanctions against cuba and spoke as how the cuban people are struggling under castro and how they long for freedom and democracy. to rid that island of it's horrible dictator we will blah, blah, blah and blah.



a little historical fact review. (if you doubt anything you read below, look it up.)



when castro rolled into havana on new year's day of 1960 he had just lead a revolution of the people against an united states backed dictator, batista. under batista, 90% of the people were illiterate, today cuba has a higher literacy rate than the united states. under batista, 97% of all the wealth of cuba was in the hands of maybe 5% of the people, now under castro, cubans share and share alike. batista, like bush, could not walk among his own people. castro, on the other hand, until his illness of last year, walked every year on the anniversary date of the revolution down havana's streets with NO GUARDS WHATSOEVER! hundreds of thousands of his fellow cubans walked with him. they shook his hand and shouted his name. no one took shots at him, no one spit on him, no one called him names and he walked without fear. compare this to george bush who would NOT GET OUT OF HIS CAR ON THE DAY OF HIS INAGURATION!!! george who will not go into a meeting of citizens unless every single person in the room has been vetted and searched. cuba exports more doctors to work in third world countries than other nation. george vetoed a child's health care program increase. cuba exports more teachers to third world countries than any other nation. george has cut education funds. all castro has ever done to us is throw batista, our friend, the brutal killer dictator, out. for this, we, the united states of america, under both democratic and republican administrations have isolated cuba, enforced strict economic sanctions on cuba which hurt the cuban citizens, have a military base that we use for a prison camp on their soil, keep in place a defacto naval seige off their shores. all this because americans bought the original story that castro was a communist and therefore a staunch enemy of the united states. gander and goose analogy applies here because we will have vital american banks, stock brokerage houses and companies owned by communist china, we will have our food and toys and tvs all come from communist china, we owe most of our national debt to communist china and at the same time we deal with communist vietnam and dealt with communist russia. but mean old nasty castro and that dangerous nation, cuba, remain on our shit-list. we have invaded them, tried to poison castro, starved their people, ruined their economy, blockcaded their country and then we have the unmedigated gall to say they are some kind of threat to us. how stupid are the american people??? more stupid than you can possibly imagine.



you see, history doesn't "end", it continues. history is, in fact, part of the present and has a real bearing on what is going on in today's world. we ignore history at our own peril, and unless we cure our ignorance and recognize the world for what it is and not what we want it to be we, the united states, will always be in conflict with someone or another. our national paranoia, which, incidently, has no basis in fact, will eventually cause our downfall. the world will unite against us, seeing us for what we really are, a militaristic, imperialistic, power-hungry nation that is a threat to world peace. and that, brothers and sisters, is just how the world percieves us this very day and each day we continue with our policies of intervertion in other's affairs, our continuing search for resources we can steal or just take by military force, our bombastic jingolism, our continuous litany of reasons for war, our failure to ever see the other side's point of view, our national ego of believing that we, and we alone, know what is best for mankind, all these unite not us, but the world and not for us but against us. and we bring it upon ourselves.



but why try to tell this to anyone when so much more important things are in the news, such as will brittney show her snatch again. who will win sucking with the stars? who will be the last comic doing hack material standing? will the patriots be beat this year? will our mindless youth get their beloved i-pod? do you have restless leg syndrome?

time present and time past
are both perhaps present in time future
and time future contained in time past.
if all time is eternally present
all time is unredeemable.
what might have been is an abstraction
remaining a perpetual possibility
only in a world of speculation.

t. s. elliot



i watched a great documentary "McLIBEL" yesterday. it is about two british activists who take on macdonald's in london. good stuff. also, it bears repeating: read FAST FOOD NATION. you will quit eating that shit if you do. because shit is what it is and corporations spend hundreds of millions in advertizing dollars to get our children to eat that shit so they will grow up to be obese adults who still are eating that shit. how stupid are americans??? more stupid than you can possibly imagine.

that is it for this beautiful day in vegas, hanging out here at home watching the workmen work.

form and function

a married couple doing home improvement work is a study in contrasts of importance or, said another way, form vs. function.

to a guy a house is where he lives. to a woman a house is her HOME. now while that may sound as if they are the same, they are not. a woman is nesting, a man is staying; though both are in the same place.

as i have said before, we have put new wood floors throughout most of the house and are now putting stone tile in the rest. when ever one of the workmen ask me "this or that?" i always say, let me call rhonda because i don't want to make any decisions; why? because i don't care whether it is 'this' or 'that' and rhonda does. i am sure the workman think i am some kind of pussy but what i am is a husband who wants his wife to happy. if she is happy, i am happy.

we have one room mostly done and in it is a perfect example of form vs. function. the room in question is the guest bedroom and on the bed are 6 pillows, two of which are to be used for sleeping (function) and the other four are strictly for looks (form). it looks nice, don't get me wrong and i am glad she did it but would i have done it? not a chance.

men are much more likely to grasp this than women are. men know they are not the same and never will be the same as women. women spend a good portion of their lives wondering why the guy doesn't have the same priorities as she. here is a clue, girls: our priorities are much more simple than yours, feed us, fuck us, send us to bed and we are happy campers. we don't care what color the wall is, does it hold up the roof? it does? cool. we don't care what color the stove is, we care if the pot roast is ready. pink and yellow pillows? you want an opinion on that? sure baby, they look great! what's for dinner? just don't talk about the pillows when it is the the three-two pitch to manny with runners on board and two outs.

one of the great things about rhonda is that she knows that i don't care and she knows that i am not going to be of any help in getting this all done other than putting the books back into our huge bookcase. i care about my books and my stereo and that is about it as far as home decorating goes. she is real good at doing this and say go baby, go.

going to go play some poker.

the draws they make

been playing on poker stars internet poker and am getting my brains beat out. you know, i have played texas hold-em now since 1991 and have won each and every year, year in and year out i have averaged 15-18 dollars per hour at this game and yet i cannot beat the internet. now, are there that much players on the internet or am i a much worse player at a computer or as has been told to me, is there cheating going on on the net? some of the draws that people make and the things they raise with and then hit right on the button is rather bothersome. i see a guy raise with 5-7 off suit and flop a straight; then later he raises with kj off and hits k,jj on the flop, raises with a pair of 4's and hits 4 on the flop. how can that be? is he just lucky beyond words or does he have someway of knowing what the flop is going to be. i have been the victim of some draws today that defy logic that someone would pay that large of a bet to try and hit a 5-1 shot or an 8 to 1 shot. i may just have to give up on the fucking internet. one of the poker writers said (i think it was brunson) there are so many ways you can be cheated he couldn't even count all the ways. blah blah blah.

on to sports. on paper, the rockies have no chance against the red sox but i will be pulling for them anyway since i am a national league fan. i found myself disliking the american league when they put in the dh because, in my opinion as a baseball purist, that is NOT BASEBALL. baseball is played with NINE players at a time and pitchers hit. the dh is only a way to let old sluggers stay in the game and draw paychecks beyond when they should. of course, when i played, way back in the last century, (lol) i could have used a dh for me since i couldn't hit my weight and i was very light at the time. i could play a wiz of a shortstop, 3rd base and i pitched several no hitters in jr. high and high school but i was worthless at the plate. i was good enough at fielding and pitching that i always was on the teams and always started but also always batted ninth. blah blah blah

why are we having debates over a year before the next election? the democrats say way too much and the republicans say nothing at all. while they are all talking, kids go on dying in iraq, our heavy handed approach to all things middle east creates new "terrorists" every day, the economy is teetering on the bring of disaster, new orleans still is in rubble, a drought is crippling the southeast and the west, the dollar is falling faster than enron stock, the real unemployment figure is probably approaching 10% t0 15% (remember, they only count as "unemployed" those who sign up for unemployment benefits in a given week and that does not count all the people who were employed in jobs in which they did not pay unemployment insurance so when they are off work it does not show up in the stats. also all the people who have exhausted their unemployment benefits but have not found a job are also dropped from the stats and then there are the cronically unemployed who have just given up), our politicians on both sides seem to be playing gotcha instead of finding ways to guide the ship of state through these troubled waters. and still they fucking talk. isn't hillary a senator? doesn't she have like something to do in washington? same with obama. most of the others are unemployed so i guess they have the time to run around the country saying nothing other than the other guy(s) is/are just dead wrong.

on the home front, we start on the stone tile tomorrow and when that is finished we will have a brand new house. the wood floors (brazilian koa) are stunning and the tile should set them off just right. means we can have a big party around the holidays. sometime i would like to let all my fans know, say 5 months in advance, of a party at my house and anyone who is in vegas at that time would be invited. so many of you have written me over the years and have said such nice things about me and my work that i think it would be just great fun to get you here to meet in person. it's a thought.

i tell you what, i sure hope i have many more years left in me, i think the best is yet to come.

my sympathy goes out to all the people in california who have been displaced by those terrible fires. i lived in the antolope valley and saw what those fires can do. if you are in any position to help them, please do so.

sunday morning musing

first of all, UNLV football really sucks. they got beat by colorado state which had not won a game all year long. unlv ran up 559 yards of total offense and still got beat by 25 points. can't wait until basketball season especially since i now have season tickets (my birthday present from rhonda) ((which is a unique aspect of married life, she gives me something for a present but a. we both pay for it and b. we both use it...but it is my present.)) (((i am thinking of giving her a new driver (golf club) for her birthday; we could break the rule...she doesn't play golf but i do. i don't think she will get the humor in that though)))

after tonight, i don't perform again until thanksgiving week when i will be in atlantic city. a month off to play poker and work on the book. thankyoujesus.

the "great escape" story may end up being a regular part of my show and has the potential to be as good as "the world's greatest dope story" because you don't see the ending coming. i am going to do it again tonight and see how it goes. the other two comics and the staff all thought it was a stunning story and i think, with practice, it can become a real centerpiece.

thanks to everyone who sent birthday greetings. i usually don't pay attention to birthdays but i was conscious of turning 65 which has always been, in my mind, the age when you are "old." now that i am there, i don't think of myself as old but, by the same token, i cannot kid myself into thinking i am anywhere near "young." hopefully, i will be around for many more years, but to tell the truth, if i were to die tomorrow, i would still say to myself on my deathbed, "ronnie, you have lived a hellava life! rock and fucking roll." i have very few regrets and to quote frank, too few to mention.

so, my friends, see you on down the line.

number 65

when i got out of prison in 1964 (or 65) the guard at the gate said to me; "you'll be back." i replyed, "no, i won't." to which he said, "your kind never changes." i just smiled and said, "you have no idea just how wrong you are."

that little exchange has always stayed with me and now here i am so many years later on my 65th birthday headlining the tropicana on the strip in las vegas. what a long strange trip it has been ... to quote the grateful dead. the adventures, the women, the sex, the money, the travels, the ups and downs of a life fully lead. my body may be scarred from the knife wounds, the shrapnel from the gunshots, the car wrecks and the beatings but, my brothers and sisters, my heart is happy and my soul is full of love and gratitude.

i told the story of how i escaped from los angeles county jail last night and we got it on film and if it is any good i am going to post it on you-tube; i told it very well and it is, in itself, a great fucking story.

bruce springstein had a song, "glory days" about how people get old and instead of doing something with their life in the now, spend their time talking about the past. while my past has some very interesting (to say the least) events, i feel as if my story is not over yet and glory days are still in front of me. i may have mentioned this before but it bears repeating, my son, hudson, came to me for advice on something and he said the reason he was asking me is that i am the only person of my generation that he knows who is happy with their life. and i am; happy with my life, my wife, where i live, what i do and where i am going. i have some of the greatest friends any man could hope to have, my children are bright, beautiful and successful, my grandchildren are healthy and happy. who could ask for anything more?

anyway, number 65 has come and gone and i am still here. see ya down the road.

paranoia?

MANICHAEAN PARANOIA is the moral certitude that one is leading the forces of good against the empire of evil. it is the idea that one's moral superiority justifies one in committing immoral acts. because one perpetrates these acts on "immoral" people, one is not morally responsible for themeans used, only the ends achieved.

the term has its roots in the ancient PERSIAN RELIGION MANICHAEISM, which held a highly dualistic view of the world----a viewpoint of black or white, enemy or friend. it split the world into good and evil which then are in constant conflict. in manchaean paranoia, this combines with a paranoia about the dark evil and the irrational fear that this evil is actively out to "get" you, causing you to fight against it or be destroyed by it. this can lead to the justification of "evil" actions in the name of good.

this intense dualism can lead to a moral polarization, where every position can take on either a morally good or morally evil cast, resulting in very little ground for neutrality. because everything is either morally good or morally evil, taking any position other than the "good" one can result in defaulting to evil. it is then possible that those who criticie the morally good are seen as automatically morally evil, while those that pledge loyalty to the morally good are seen as morally good no matter what actions they may commit.

THIS IS FROM WIKIPEDIA, the encyclopedia on the internet.

read the above again. then listen to "right wing" radio talk or the speeches of george w. bush and see what conclusions you draw.

from the "you are either with us or against us" of gwb's speech or the unending attack on "liberalism" by the commentators on right wing radio, you will hear that moral certitude coming through. they are "right" and anyone who disagrees in any way is therefore "wrong." to disagree with bush is to be a supporter of terrorism. no middle ground, no way to compromise, no way to even discuss.

i listened to two right wing radio shows the other day (have no idea who they were), one of which was going on and on about how "war against evil is good" and how "war purifies a nation". the other one (may have been coulter) was ranting about how the "left" has no intellectaul basis for their arguments and therefore all leftist arguments are invalid. both shows kept complimenting their own listeners on "how intelligent" they are for listening to them. the inability to listen to the other side and to automatically discount any view that does not agree is not a sign of intellect. it is a sign of either sickness or stupidity. or manichaean paranoia.

sports, elections, recessions, a great comic

proving once again that i would make a very poor sports bettor; unlv did not beat byu, lsu got beat by kentucky (oh, that one did my heart good...i detest lsu for the sake of a couple of their fans who are on my list for all time assholes. so, go wildcats!!!). about two months ago you could have bet the rockies to win the national league pennant at 200 to 1 and the world series at 350-1. if you had bet that and then bet south florida to be in the top 5 in football you would be rich.

wood floors are in but tile is on hold while we do some plumbing work in the laundry room. the great dane is pissed because he has been banished along with his maniac buddy to the pool area while all the work is going on. he looks at me rather disapprovingly.....

i worry that hillary, if nominated, is the ONLY democrat that could lose the election next year. i also think that if al gore were to enter the race he would win the democratic nomination and would go on to win the presidency that he was denied in 2000 when the bush gang pulled off their little supreme court coup. gore is well respected around the world and would, in my opinion, make an excellent president for the times we find ourselves in. he has the experience and the intelligence to pull us out of the rut we are in.

speaking of which, the housing debacle is going to keep on spreading and we could very well find ourselves in a recession by the middle of next year. (remember, i am much, much better at predicting economic situations than i am at sports.) the layoffs in, not only the construction business, but all the related industries, lumber, mortgage bankers with all their support people, appraisers, home insurance companies, all the manufactors of nails, roofs, staples, dry walls, etc etc etc and so on and so forth will push the unemployment figures up to the 7-8% range which then throws more industries into disarray including all the require discretionary spending, restaurants, movies, night clubs and so forth. of course, if we are in a recession in the summer of 08 it will mean a democratic landslide in the elections of the fall. this is what has happened over the last two decades, a republican gets in, fucks up the economy royally and then the democrats have to come in and clean up the mess. ronnie reagan, the saint of the republicans, was a horrible president (but he was likable) and left the country in such a financial hole that bush the first had to raise taxes just to keep us afloat which cost him the election of 92. clinton came in and raised taxes on the rich (HORRORS OF HORRORS!!!) and the economy took off and we had, lo and behold, peace and prosperity for 8 years. and then came bush and with bush came war and debt and division and world-wide hatred of america.

speaking of republicans, have you watched fred, the new hope, in the debates? what a fucking joke. this is the guy the republicans were counting on? moving at the speed of a sloth with the intelligence to match, fred stumbles into the fray. jesus! rudy has one speech which consists of REMEMBER 9-11!, REMEMBER 9-11, REMEMBER 9-11. ask him about health care, he brings up 9-11, ask him about the economy, he brings up 9-11. hell, his kids hate him. his ex-wives hate him, the firefighters of new york city hate him. in other words, the people who know him best hate him. he is the republican leader. jesus! mitt, with all his hair, has one speech and that is calling hillary names. jesus! mitt even makes jokes about edwards hair. jesus! ron paul is the only republican that has any concrete ideas and the courage to tell the truth so he is unelectable. if you watched the republican debates you would never know we are in iraq. they all avoided that subject, prefering to talk about tax breaks for the rich and the evils of gay marriage. jesus!

i am working with a guy this week, andrew kennedy, who is a real hoot. if you ever get a chance to see him, do so. he is the real deal. i had never heard of him but it is a pleasure to watch his show. check him out.

gotta go, glad to have our computers back up. may peace come to all of us.

dis and dat

we are putting in all new hardwood floors throughout the house and stone tiles in the halls, kitchen and bathrooms so the shock household is a disaster zone but when we are through....

surely looking forward to this coming week at the trop here in vegas. it will be, as i have said before, the week of my 65th birthday and my shows are going to be all stories including the one about escaping from l.a. county jail which is working out very smoothly. next year i am going to do one comedy show per month and the rest of the time will be either on a speaking tour or playing poker. the book should be finished by spring/summer of 08.

i kinda of hope that al gore jumps into the presidential race because he is the most qualified of all out there and i think he would win in a landslide. a nobel peace prize is quite an endorsement. he has a resume that none can match on either side and the rest of the canidates look like midgets compared to this man. if he doesn't get in then i am leaning (not that anyone cares) towards obama. hillary tries too hard to out-macho the others and ends up sounding like bush lite other than an anti-war democrat. 2013 my ass! feb. of 2009 is the target date i want to hear. obama came under fire for saying that he would meet with leaders of countries regardless of who they were; cuba, iran, north korea, syria etc. in my opinion, that is what we need, dialogue. what harm can come of that? we will get better co-operation from talk than we will from threats and saber-rattling a la bush. those countries that i named HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING TO US. we just don't like them. we have a trade embargo against cuba but outsource our workers to communist china. castro overthrew a right wing dictator and brought more prosperity to cuba than was ever known before. kill him!

unlv may upset byu tomorrow, you heard it here first

revise opinion

always wanting to give credit where it is due: tonight, on the last show of the whole road trip, i had an incredible audience here in chattanooga so i may have to revise my thinking from previous post.

that is all, off to play on line poker and go home tomorrow.

the last f-----g week on the road!!!!!

ten weeks on the road and i am going home tomorrow! good fucking god, this has been a long one. chattanooga has been the slowest, drunkest and smallest audiences that i have played to on this trip. while i like the owner, michael alfano, a lot and always enjoy seeing him, i don't think this will be on my list from here on out. i will probably change my mind because i am sure it is shaded by how long i have been out here....

i see where oral robert's son, richard and his demon wife are writing a new chapter for me. stay tuned as i put it together.

i see where government inspectors have found massive fraud in the insurance companies handling of the medicare program. what a surprise! insurance agents lying? why who ever heard of such a thing. way back before i got into the book business i worked for three different insurance companies and later i was a consultant to another one and each and every one of them taught their agents to lie. lies of commission and of omission. misleading and confusing statements to throw the customer's understanding off. we need a single payer, government run national health care system; it is our only hope to get out of the crisis we are in. if we leave it in the hands of the insurance companies we are just throwing money at them. remember, an insurance company's goal or purpose is not to pay claims but to collect premiums. they don't want to pay a single claim and use every possible trick in their little book to keep from doing so. the veterans administration is a national health care plan for a select group and it does, for the most part, an admirable job. i know, i am a veteran and am in the v.a. if we can do it for millions and millions of veterans and another group of millions and millions of federal employees then we can damn well do it for everybody. doesn't that make sense? federal employees have excellent insurance coverage, we all should do so good.

playing on line again and am up just a tiny, tiny bit which is good since i started in a deep hole to start with; the internet has always given me problems. i have a hard time paying attention on the net, much more so than live play where i watch each and every little thing. oh well, am ahead.

got to get home and watch them put our new floors in. for all of you who came out and saw me on this trip, thank you very much. be sure and call/write/email sirius and xm radio and request me.

hope to see some of you the week of oct. 15-21 at the trop in vegas.

paranoid ron

one of those chilling sentences defining these times in the united states during the reign of the current King George. (in USA Today yesterday.)

the article is talking about MRAP'S (mine resistant ambush protected) vehicles in iraq. these are the "new" vehicles for our troops because they have a V shaped hull which deflects explosions from underneath the vehicle. problem is that now the enemy is using a device that shoots through the side of the vehicle and kills the men. so, what the army wants to do is to put extra armour on the sides. the defense contractor complained that they did not want to do that because:

"that would make the vehicle too wide for operation on AMERICAN FREEWAYS"

now, my question is: why would they want this vehicle to OPERATE on american freeways unless, of course, they plan on using it here? maybe to put down civilian resistance against the war?

i know, i am just paranoid. but it reminds me of a conversation between hans and fritz in berlin circa 1934.

hans: " you are just paranoid, fritz, he is not going to do that;

he is not going to start a war under false premises, he would not tell us that a certain country attacked us and so we have to invade.

he is not going to build secret prisons in foriegn countries.

he is not going to be able to arrest anyone, anywhere, including our citizens and put them in confinement without access to lawyers or civilian courts just by declaring them 'enemies.'

he wouldn't let anyone torture a prisoner. we are not that kind of people.

he is not going to have a government agcency spying on our citizens, opening mail and listening to phone calls.

he is not going to unite the rest of the world against us.

you are just paranoid, fritz, that can't happen here, why we are civilized country filled with people who respect the law. why, we brought the world beethovan and mozart and goethe and einstien. "

hitler started world war two by invading poland. he justified his attack by telling the german people that poland not only had attacked a german military post but was planning an invasion of the homeland.

most of the concentration camps were not on german soil.

he, of course, got permission from the courts to arrest not only jews but communists, gypsies, catholics, and anyone deemed undesirable.

world war two united the world against germany, japan and italy.

compare to:
weapons of mass destruction were not in iraq nor iraq have anything to do with 9-11
the cia admits to having secret prisons in foriegn countries.
we send 'prisoners" to countries such as egypt where they are tortured.
we can and do arrest people with warrants issued by secret courts that answer to no one.
we open mail, check what books you read, open your emails, listen to phone conversations.
we are hated and feared by most of the world.

yes, he would.
yes, he did.

and

yes, he is.
yes, he has.

but it can't happen here; we are a peace loving country filled with people who respect the law.

so, ron, you are just paranoid. they probably want them for parades down our freeways.

"i couldn't get over the fact..."

here is bill o'reilly's statement that i referred to in an earlier post: (he was dining at sylvia's in harlem)


"i couldn't get over the fact that there was no difference between sylvia's restaurant and any other restaurant in new york city. i mean, it was exactly the same, even though it's run by blacks, with primarily black patronship.

"it was like going into an italian restaurant in an all-white suburb in the sense of people who were sitting there and they were ordering and having fun. and there wasn't any kind of craziness at all.

"there wasn't one person in sylvia's who was screaming, "m-f-er, i want more ice tea."


with all due respect to clarence page, whose writings i enjoy a lot, mr. o'reilly is not only ignorant, he IS a racist. the above is a racist statement if i ever read one. he "couldn't get over the fact" why couldn't he get over it? was it that big of surprise that blacks were behaving in a civil manner? "even though it was run by blacks" unfuckingbelievable! his words betray his later denials. gee, they used knives and forks did they bill? christ almighty. and this is a man whom millions look to for their news.

if anyone reading this does not think those words were racist, please write me and give me your reasons, maybe i am missing something here. but personally, i can't get over the fact that this man is taken seriously by anyone other than other racists and complete and total morons.

while i have spoken of this before let me reinterate: racism is a cancer eating at our collective soul. like it or not, all men are brothers and, like it or not, we all are in this together. to quote one of the truly great americans, dr. martin luther king, jr., "an injustice to one is an injustice to all."

this is not to say that racism is strictly a white american problem, it is not, there are black racists as well, asian racists, brown racists and so on and so forth but because whites run this country (and i am white) i write more about the white racists than i do of the others.

i have taken other comics to task for what i saw as racist material and will not allow it on any show that i am in. they can go find another headliner before i work with a racist comic in front of me. since i am on this track, let me also say that way too many of the black and brown comics are racist in their material and sometimes it is almost a reverse racism that they are preaching. here is a little piece of logic for you; ALL BLACK PEOPLE DO ..... or ALL WHITE PEOPLE DO..... or ALL BROWN PEOPLE DO... is RACIST. once you put that ALL in there you are putting forth a racist point. don't give me that, "it is just a joke" bullshit either. i would like to hear more comics of color do a set without mentioning color. franklin ajaye, a great comic, mentions he is black one time and one time only in his set; he says "i went to an all black high school; matter of fact, that was the name of it; the all black high school." that's it. other than that, if you listened to him on a c.d. you would not know his color. funny doesn't have a color. my comic hero would have to be richard pryor and he, himself, came to the same conclusion and changed his whole attitude and never used the word, "niggar" again. and guess what? he was still funny. funny doesn't have a color. funny is funny if it is funny to all races. the whore walking into the bar doesn't have a color. the lion fucking the giraffe doesn't have a color. just color them both funny.

i lived in harlem for six months in 1961 and one of the great loves of my life was a black woman. in the army and in prison my two best friends were black and brown. my next door neighbor and good friend, carlos, is hispanic. all of these people, even the guys in prison, are decent human beings. in prison, i was one of the few, if not the only, people who could walk among any of the races and be treated with respect. they all knew i "could hold my mud" as the expression then went. i spent almost two years in the "adjustment center" which was the euphuism for, what is better known as, "the hole." most of the people in there were of color and since we had no one other than each other to talk to i became friends with "red man", the leader of nascent black power movement in the california prison system and "mosca" (i may be spelling that wrong, it is the spanish word for "fly") who was the leader of one of the mexican gangs. these two men and i spent thousands of hours talking about our lives, our friends, our hopes, our dreams and, you know what, the stories were all basically the same. mosca's mother was the only person to visit me while i was in prison; i had taught her son to read english and both she and him wanted me to live with them when i got out. so don't talk racism to me.

and these are my thoughts on this tuesday morning in las vegas. peace be to us all.

an order of freedom fries, please

i amaze myself at times by being such a good player on one day and an idiot on another. today i was the idiot. lost two hundred and it was all my fault.

grumble grumble.

on to other things: what a ball game tonight between the padres and rockies. was glad to see colorado win since i don't like the padres because they sometimes play in camouflage uniforms. warmongers. san diego is such a right wing town that it is hard for me to pull for any of their teams.

speaking of war and those who wage it, hillary says that she will keep american troops in iraq until at least 2013 to protect american interests and "fight terrorists." hey hillary, we are the terrorists in iraq. the people who are fighting us are not terrorists, they are people who don't like foriegn invaders and have decided to fight back. let me put it this way, if i were an iraqi, american warmongers would be calling me a terrorist because i would be doing every possible thing i could to rid my country of the invaders. (wouldn't you?) just what american interests is she speaking of? the american embassy building that costs a billion dollars and is bigger than the vatican? the oil that we came to steal? the permanant bases that we have built? (if we were ever really planning on leaving iraq, why did we build four huge permanent military bases there?) if 70% of americans want us out of iraq now, why is she taking this position? is she just another spokesperson for the military industrial oil complex? methinks so.

for those of you who have not read george orwell's 1984 RECENTLY, please do so. it will chill your blood as you see US in the book. war is peace don't cha know? i know i have said this before but please read that book again even if you did read it years ago, it will mean so much more to you now.

what i am afraid of is that war has become so ingrained and entrenched in our collective psyche that we don't really think of it any more. the iraqi war has now lasted longer than world war two and still no end in sight. where are the peace protests? where is the outrage? what does it take for the american people to get good and fucking mad about this? sometimes i think that only rhonda and i are the only ones who give a shit. i know that is not true but i can see hundreds of people a week and NOT A FUCKING ONE BRINGS UP THE WAR. i do and then they look at me as if i were some kind of weirdo for caring. for being upset. oh, they say they are against it, but only if you push them into saying it. left to their own, they would never bring it up.

IF YOU ARE NOT SPEAKING OUT AGAINST THE WAR YOUR SILENCE IS SUPPORTING IT. BLOOD IS ON YOUR HANDS. AND IT IS A LOT OF FUCKING BLOOD.

does that sound harsh? poor baby. well here is a news flash: war is harsh. the cities we have destroyed in iraq, the children we have killed, the families we have displaced, those are harsh too. if you don't speak out, you killed the babies, you destroyed the cities, you displaced the families. yeah, you. motherfucker. i am talking to YOU.

i believe that george bush is a war criminal and he is trying to get legislation passed that will keep him from being charged as such when his term is up. i, for one, want to see him and cheney in the dock for crimes against humanity. powell, rice and rumsfeld as well. rove and wolfawitz (sp?) and maybe even little ol' scooter all should spend the rest of their miserable lives in prison. if some poor black kid can be sent to prison for 30 years for selling a small amount of crack, surely these guys (and one very bright but very evil woman) can be sent off for killing hundreds of thousands of people, for stealing our national treasury and ruining the name of america for generations to come. couldn't they? it won't happen of course because to try them would require america doing some very honest self-examination and that is something we just don't do here. we want to believe we are so nice. so smart. so peace-loving. here is another news flash for you: we are not nice nor smart nor peace loving. we are a thuggish, war mongering ignorant people who blindly follow our so-called leaders. you may not agree with me but the VAST MAJORITY of the rest of the world does. but hell, what do they know? bunch of damn foriegners. faggots. ragheads. (you know, all those names we call people from other lands)

i wonder how many restuarants are still serving "freedom fries" instead of french fries. remember that? turns out the FRENCH WERE RIGHT AND WE WERE WRONG. but somehow no one ever seems to say that in public. the french were right. we were wrong. grab hold of that. get rid of your prejudice and see us as others do.

once, and not so long ago, we were the hope of the world. now the world fears us. we are hated. could 5 and one half BILLION PEOPLE ALL BE WRONG? yeah, they must be, because we are americans and we never do anything wrong. faggot-french-commie-ragheads don't know what they are talking about.

oh well, just me, a drug addled comic/poker player farting in the wind with nobody listening and even less caring.